A Pledge for
Politicians
by Dante DeAmicis
It
seems that more and more politicians are trying to get their opponents
to sign their pet campaigning pledges. I think we should consider
the source. And what about after they are elected? That's when
the real problems begin. Oh well, I guess it is up to me, so here
it is, my ...
Responsible Representation Pledge
1. |
|
I will
not advocate that any group do anything that would be illegal for an individual
to do. |
2. |
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I will
represent the district but will not claim to represent anyone who didn't
vote for me. |
3. |
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I will
not charge to future generations things that mostly benefit my present
constituents. |
4. |
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I will
not expect anyone to do anything for the "Common Good" that I wouldn't
be willing to do myself. |
5. |
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I will
vote to fix my salary to some multiple of the median wage earner. |
6. |
|
I will
not support measures that prevent people from securing their own food,
shelter, clothing, or providing these things for others. |
7. |
|
I will
support the people's right to form new governments, that is, new cities,
de-annexations, or smaller districts from larger ones. |
Please Sign |
I
can hardly wait to send it to the people hustling my vote.![10x5 Page Background GIF Image](../../Images/10x5_Page_Background.gif)
Hootin'
For Joy
by Sam Aurelius Milam III
The
Equal Employment Opportunitity Commission (EEOC) recently dropped its case
against the Hooters restaurant chain. Hooters is the chain that's
famous for the luscious babes who flaunt their, uh, attributes as waitresses
at the Hooters restaurants. Hooters attracted the attention of the
EEOC when it refused to hire men for the jobs. However, not to worry.
There will not be a case from the EEOC this time, and the threatened $22,000,000
fine has been dropped. The EEOC "recommends" that men be hired, but
it will not take further action in the matter.1
What's
the significance of this decision? The EEOC accepts that a restaurant
can refuse, based on gender, to hire men for jobs that they could do just
as well as women can do them. This is a hypocrisy test for feminists.
That is, it's now acceptable for a restaurant to refuse, based on gender,
to hire women for jobs that they could do just as well as men can do them.
After this, there should be no more feminine squeals of outrage about discrimination
based on gender. Of course, it's equally likely that U.S. Senator
Dianne Feinstein will concede that the Oklahoma City bombing was a legitimate
act of retaliation in response to government terrorism, the Russians will
acknowledge the sovereignty of Chechnya, the Christian Coalition will open
a legal defense fund for pedophiles, and Carl Sagan will propose that the
moon is made of green cheese.![10x5 Page Background GIF Image](../../Images/10x5_Page_Background.gif)
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^
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KSBW
Channel 8 Action News Live at Five; Salinas, California; Wednesday,
May 1, 1996 |
The
Twilight Koan
by Don Cormier
Imagine,
if you will, a planet in a far-off galaxy, inhabited by beings of tremendous
egotism, whose main urge is to dominate and control others of their kind,
and who will co-operate only when forced to do so. Further imagine,
if you will, that after a period of unlimited strife, the social order
of the planet developed into a hierarchy, with the most powerful individual
dominating all less powerful individuals, with the 2nd most powerful dominating
his underlings, and so on. Of course, in such an imaginary society,
the youngest members are the least powerful, and the easiest to dominate
So
imagine, if you will, a class of children, who are not only controlled
by force, but further controlled by a lie. The lie is this:
that there exists an invisible, all knowing judge who sees people who disobey,
and who will punish such disobedience at some unknown future time.
Not immediately, mind you, but in some horrible way at some unknown future
date, frequently by engineering some terrible accident or disease.
Further
imagine that many generations of beings on this planet have been taught
this lie, so that most of the beings do not even know that it is a lie,
but spend their lives in cringing fear, not only of those about them who
they can see, hear, and touch, but of this mysterious, unknown, twilight
judge.
So
we have, for your consideration, a planet of terror and domination, where
the most terrifying threat of all does not really exist. Of course,
none of this really exists — does it?![10x5 Page Background GIF Image](../../Images/10x5_Page_Background.gif)
Aw, come on! You're foolin', right?
A place like that couldn't really exist, could it?
— editor
Given infinity, all things are equally
probable.
— Stephen Hawking, Cambridge
University
A world is supported by four things:
The learning of the wise, the justice of the great, the prayers of the
righteous and the valor of the brave. But all these are as nothing
without a ruler who knows the art of ruling.
— from Dune, by Frank
Herbert
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Buck Hunter Shoots Off His Mouth
What's the main cause of divorce?
— Newlywed
Dear Newlywed
Marriage
• My thanks to
Sir James the Bold, of Mere Keep, for the procurement of software for the
newsletter computer system.
• My thanks to
Sir
John the Generous, of Mere Keep, for the procurement of hardware for
the newsletter computer system.
• My thanks to
Mars, of Silicon Valley, for procuring, repairing, and maintaining the
newsletter copier.
— editor
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